Monday, October 28, 2019

Back to the Drawing Board



Monday 10/28/19 Natalie Update:

Two weeks ago Natalie and I went to UNC for x-rays to check the progress of her halo traction therapy. There were minor corrections in her curvature but nothing that made her doctors super excited. Since there was such little progress they decided to give it two weeks before checking again to see if more stretching would occur during that time. So we waited the two weeks and we were able to have a week at home without having to ride back to the hospital or go to football practice (which was nice). It was pretty clear that Natalie’s lengthening progress was slowing down a bit so we decided that both Joanna and I should be at this appointment this past week in case her doctors wanted to discuss further plans or adjustments. So we checked the kids out of school, hit the road to Chapel Hill, and made an afternoon out of it.

As always, we rolled into the Ambulatory building parking lot looking like the Beverly Hillbillies with our trailer full of medical equipment, did the usual rigmarole with the x-ray teachs, and waited around for a report. Quickly, Dr. Stone came in and explained that in his opinion the halo was no longer working and that we needed to proceed with another surgery on November 5th (yes, next Tuesday). He had already decided and had it scheduled. He proposed that Natalie needs a permanent posterior thoracic/lumbar osteotomy and fusion. There is a longer official name for the procedure but essentially it is; going into the back of her spine and manipulating some of her bones around (via osteotomy), straightening things up as much as possible and permanently attaching her thoracic spine and part of her lumbar spine in place (fusion). The way her back and body functions after this surgery is the way it will be forever. After this procedure is done there would be no more operations for Natalie. Literally the last one for her back at least. As we supposed, Dr. Stone couldn’t give us a clear idea of how much correction could be made during this procedure but rather he gave us an honest but disheartening answer of “it won’t be worse”. He went over why he thought this was the best next step and he told us that there were “no other options” that would be appropriate. He rightly communicated that without a solution she would eventually “expire” from cardio-pulmonary dysfunction over time. He said growth rods or any other distraction-based options wouldn’t be a good idea because she was too small and that they wouldn’t ultimately work due to her Arthrogrypotic posturing (meaning her bone/joint stiffness, curvature, and positioning...we can discuss this another day). He said that there were other techniques out there like tethering (VBT) but the colleagues he has advising him on Natalie would not recommend any of these techniques at this time.

So, needless to say, we were devastated. Once again, we have another situation where her team is saying, “we’re out of options”. This procedure would be significantly impactful to Natalie’s overall growth and well-being for the rest of her life. Because of the thoracic fusion a portion of her torso would inevitably be stunted. The overall impact of this stunting is yet to be seen. She could possibly keep her current trunk rotation since most torso rotation comes from the cervical and lumbar region of the spine but that rotation could also be stunted. Also, most likely she would still have a significant curvature of scoliosis and kyphosis and her mobility would be limited similar to what it already was pre-halo. I asked hypothetically if technology advances would this surgery have the potential of reversal if a newer procedure were invented? The answer was “no”. So it’s truly permanent. Dr. Stone was 100% behind us on looking for as many second opinions as we needed which gives us confidence in him all the more. I think that’s what all doctors should recommend. At first we agreed with him that this next procedure was inevitable and since we weren’t medical experts we would take his opinion and get the surgery on the books. So we signed the waivers, got the surgery soap, and we got it on the schedule. But we didn’t feel right about it. We talked all the way home and then just sat in shock, silence, and exhaustion for a few days. We just felt that we weren’t ready to give up hope just yet.

At the end of the day Joanna and I are both realists when it comes to life and Natalie. But, we both have a pretty large dose of idealism in our DNA. We like to dream. We know this permanent surgery will more than likely be the only option for Natalie and we can live with that BUT, what we can’t live with is not seeking out people to dream with us for a while. We need to make sure there isn’t something else out there. So we’re starting over for a season. We’re seeking out doctors to look at Natalie holistically and make recommendations based on several aspects of her livelihood and not just survival. We want people to take into account the impact of a preadolescent fusion and how a permanent solution on an 8 year old might be too hasty. We know that the option given by UNC will Lord willingly keep her alive BUT we hope for more than mere survival. We are hoping to find a doctor that can help allow her to grow as much as she can and to physically become the young woman that she was always meant to be. We want her to look back on her childhood and know that we fought well for her. If her mobility is limited then so be it. If she can’t run like other kids then we accept that reality. We want Our Natalie to be exactly who she is meant to be. As we decide on her next step I look back on all the times doctors have told us that there were “no other options”. Most of those times, they were wrong. Before birth we were told that the only options for Natalie after birth were pretty dire…they were wrong. While in the NICU they said she’d only be able to eat from a feeding tube…they were wrong. They told us that she might not walk…they were wrong. They told us a growth rod was the only option for her back…they were wrong. They told us she’d only thrive in a separated classroom for intellectually disabled children…they were wrong. Just last year we were told that Natalie would never get a High School Diploma and I can’t wait for her to prove them wrong. Dr. Stone is probably right about this final surgery but I have to hold onto a glimmer of hope that he might be wrong. Once we explore as much as we can then we’ll be reasonable and do what needs to be done. But until then, we’re gonna keep dreaming.

So we’re currently scheduling visits this week. We talked with the Paley Institute in West Palm Beach, Florida today and they specialize in cases like Natalie. The Paley Institute is not covered by her insurance but they will allow us to self pay for the initial visit to see if other options are out there. We have no idea what timeframe as to when they’ll be able to see her but we hope it will be sooner than later. We’ve also scheduled an appointment with the Shriners' Hospitals who work with experienced ortho specialists that can weigh in. We met an amazingly kind man here in town while eating at “Harry’s Place” that got the ball rolling for us with the Elkin Shriners. We’re meeting with him tomorrow afternoon to talk about visit options. After that, we’ll regroup and see what else is available. We know this next little bit will be exhausting and to be quite honest we’re already exhausted but, I think in the end it’ll be worth it. So please keep us in your thoughts and prayers over the next little bit. We’re heading into uncharted territory so any reasonable tips or guidance in these areas will be so greatly appreciated. We’ll get there eventually.

Thanks again for all your kindness through this process.

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